Lent is always a funny time of year for the modern Christian. Suddenly, indeed, almost out of nowhere, non Christian friends, colleagues and relations are all talking about what they intend to give up as part of this traditional Christian period. "Coffee!" one might cry out, or just as commonly, "chocolate!"
"I really want to cut down on sugar." "I need to stop smoking." For so many Lent is, like New Year, a time to look at our lives and try to make them better for ourselves by eradicating bad habits or unhealthy lifestyle choices. Some, finding the annual sacrifice of vending machine chocolate to be superficial, seek to 'take something up', to start doing, or to do more of something they consider to be virtuous in some way. Thus everyone seems to agree that Lent is about nothing more than self-denial and self-improvement.
Don't get me wrong. These are not in themselves bad things to do and indeed if you do not believe that our existence extends any further than the physical 'self', perhaps there is no need for anything more. Lent is a nice (if at times difficult) thing to do once a year, both as a tradition and as a piece of mental and physical spring cleaning, and it comes with an overture of pancakes, so what more could one want?
I find Lent to be completely unsatisfying. I have proven my ability to live without (amongst other things) chocolate, coffee and computer games for a set period. Great! Achievement unlocked! Now what? At best I got a small sense of accomplishment, at worst I was driven to distraction by the lack of something I was fond of. There was never much more to it, even when I tried to make there be.
There was a key word in there, however: distraction. I'll come back to it in a bit.
Firstly I want to get back to what Lent is supposed to be about. The word Shriven in the title is a clue. It's part of the same verb - 'to shrive' - as the 'shrove' in Shrove Tuesday, otherwise known as Pancake Day. Now I love Pancake Day. It's such a great opportunity for eating really good food and is especially fun when shared with friends. Last night we managed an improvised main course involving minced beef, tomatoes and spices, followed by traditional lemon and sugar pancakes and one awesome Nutella and marshmallow specimen, which will definitely be repeated in the future.
Fun though it was, however, Shrove Tuesday is not really about pancakes. 'To shrive' means to confess, so rather than stuffing myself with pancakes, what I should have been doing was admitting all that is wrong with my life. (These are not entirely mutually exclusive activities, by the way, so pancake eating may continue). Why? So that I can then make a list of those things, followed by an action plan with SMART targets, complete with dates for review (first one: Easter)? As the apostle Paul was fond of saying, by no means! My confession isn't made to myself or to a counsellor or even to a friend. It is made to God, admitting to Him that I am not all I should be, that the things I do are in rebellion against Him, hurt Him, and are destructive to me and those around me. I am a bad man. I do so many things which can hurt people, belittle them, devalue them. I don't do so many things I could do to help them, build them up, love them. I do not honour God as I should, not with my whole being and I act as a poor witness to an unbelieving world. I think things which make me ashamed - there is a dark being here beneath the surface.
But wait! You're possibly starting to get the impression that I'm deeply unstable and filled with self loathing by now. Stop! You're wrong. What I am is a realist, and one with a clear picture of where I stand before God and what I'd be without Him, besides I'm reasonably sure you're about as bad as I am. "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:23).
Because of Him, I know that the picture I painted above is not the end of the story, but let's not have any spoilers just yet. What's next?
Well, the day after Pancake Day is Ash Wednesday. Ashes have long been a symbol of repentance (like sackcloth and ashes for example). Repentance is turning away from something, in this case, from all those things you've confessed are wrong with your life. How is that different from the action plan and the SMART targets? Christian repentance is not just turning away from all we get wrong - sin - but turning towards God.
We recognise two things: one, we can't fix ourselves, not completely, and in attempting to do so we're really only ignoring God and so adding to our sin; two, God is the centre and purpose of all existence and it is right for us to seek Him and devote ourselves to Him. In repenting we look to God to help us overcome sin and we build a relationship with Him. This should be the focus of Lent, indeed the focus of all human existence, turning towards God, getting to know Him more, loving Him and worshipping Him.
Lent, then, is a period set aside for being back to basics with God before we reach Easter, the commemoration and celebration of Jesus' death and resurrection, which, if it happened as Christians believe it did, is the defining event of history for all humanity and worth preparing for.
But it's difficult to find time for God. Our very nature ('the sinful nature' in Paul's letters) is opposed to doing it, and the world is full of distractions. It always has been, but it seems that there may be more distractions in our modern media-filled world than ever before. Almost all of us are on some sort of social network, which we check regularly. We watch TV box sets, carry millions of books on e-readers or tablets. There are few these days who do not carry a smart phone with which to access all this information at any time. I'm writing this post on one now! Information - good, bad, cute, ugly - is everywhere and we feel compelled to keep up with it and to add to it, making a busy day so much busier.
I know I'm guilty of this. I read on the bus or on my break in work, I check my phone compulsively, post thoughts on Twitter, check for reactions on Facebook, watch DVDs whilst feeding my daughter in the morning, play computer games in spare moments, look everything up on Wikipedia, and on and on and on. These things are not necessarily bad, indeed much good has come of them and will continue to do so, I am sure. What it is, however, is very, very distracting, and if God really is the centre and purpose of the universe, then we may be so distracted as to miss the point entirely.
So, this Lent, I'm trying something different. I'm giving things up, certainly, and I'm taking things up as well, but it's all being done with a very clear purpose in mind. I want to detox, if you will, from many of these distractions. I'm giving up reading fiction and watching boxsets in the morning, because these things, more than any other, tend to define my day. Instead I'm reading books on theology and Christian practice and listening to sermons, with a view to focusing on God and, above all else, actually listening to Him.
Now, I know I'm blogging about this and I intend to keep doing so throughout Lent, but it's not to look super spiritual and make everyone else look bad. This is not about me, or you, but about God. The reason I've chosen to blog it is threefold: as a witness to those who know me but don't yet know God; as an encouragement to fellow Christians who might want to do something similar (and an opportunity for them to help encourage me - I might need it) and as a way of focusing and recording my thoughts during this period, so that, if I learn anything or grow spiritually at all, I just might not forget it.
So, it's Ash Wednesday, Lent has begun. I'm currently reading 'Meditation and communion with God: contemplating scripture in an age of distraction' by John Jefferson Davis and listened, this morning, to the Reverend Dominic Smart talk about Song of Songs. I'm feeling positive, a little scared and hopeful that, in all of this, I won't miss the point again, but will meet with the one true and living God, my Father, saviour, friend.
Here goes...
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